Wrong time to do this...

[meganlynn09]

But I can't help it. I'm not in the best of moods and I so should not being doing this now, but it's gotta get out!

Okay, so why is it when a MAN is pining/in love and it's unrequited, it's cute and tragic and romantic and we love him (ex: Jim Halpert of The Office), and when it's a WOMAN, it's pathetic (ex: Toshiko Sato of Torchwood)?

Feminism rearing it's head or hypocrisy or both or something else?

Like when it was so sweet that Ten kept "mourning" Rose, but it was childish and stupid that Martha was "pining" for Ten.

Or maybe it's just something personal, because I've been there (especially the liking a guy who doesn't deserve it nor return it), and I can relate and I can say it's made me the better, like a certain Martha Jones.

Comments

[calapine.livejournal.com]

I dunno but the "mourning" and "grieving" trope makes me twitch cause she ain't dead.

[meganlynn09.livejournal.com]

Very very true, and I agree. I got the being sad that you lost your best friend, but "mourning" felt like it went too far.

[meganlynn09.livejournal.com]

It's the good ole double standard, yeah. I just don't understand when WE'RE ALL JUST GONNA GET OVER IT.

OH, your icon! *misses teh Lizzie*

[aerynvala.livejournal.com]

For me I am bothered by women pining because I want women to be better than that. I have no issue with them being attracted to someone that they can't have, in general. I'm bothered by the way most media portrays the whole situation. When Ten was 'mourning' Rose he was still him. Still whole and functional. His entire character wasn't subsumed to the mourning. At least, not in my opinion. Female characters, however, tend to become one-note and one-dimensional. *shrugs*

[meganlynn09.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I do know what you mean. Writers do tend to like writing men more than for women, as too many shows have women's lives just always revolve around men. And that is a different issue than what my problem is. It's with fandom, and what seems to be a double standard, it bothers me when so many in fandom seem to be female.

And I do know what you mean about Ten, 'cause no, I don't really think it took over his characterization in S3. But I don't think Martha's love for the Doctor took over her characterization either. Yes, it drove her in many ways, but in a lot of fandom, they seem to think it was overpowering, when it was as "heavy" as the Doctor missing Rose. IMHO.

[aerynvala.livejournal.com]

Oh, I didn't have a problem with Martha. Well, except that I'm tired of female characters always having to "fall for" the lead male characters. That gets old for me. And I really didn't see Martha's attraction to the Doctor being as intense as his whatever over Rose, honestly.

As far as fandom response? Yeah, that gets really ugly towards women characters. I have actively avoided DW communities since Rose's departure. It was just nasty and unpleasant all around.

[meganlynn09.livejournal.com]

Oh, sorry, I wasn't meaning to infer you did :) Actually, I wasn't sure how you felt about her! But I do get what you mean. While I'm one of the very very few that actually liked the storyline, I also didn't at the same time because it was Ten. heh

Yeah, I only have one DW comm left (besides the fic comm and the icon one) on my f-list. And after a few posts there, now I'm considering leaving that one.

[noperfectlife.livejournal.com]

That's a very fair point! I just really hate how everything is always automatically blamed on the woman when something goes wrong, or how a man will look strong or sweet or whatever when he'll do something when a woman would be called weak, reckless if she does the same thing.

Your rant is very appropriated!

[meganlynn09.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :D Totally with you.